I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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