Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
