did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
