Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
