ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
