There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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