Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
