dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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