Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
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