; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
