Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
