I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
