sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
