how do flat chested girls get laid?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
