we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
