Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
