Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Randomize