Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
