The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
