im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
