I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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