I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
