Sry I called you an 8
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
