I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
