On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
She's just so happy...and so naked.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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