Having a random hookup so left but love u
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
