I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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