I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
