If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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