I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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