Whod you bang
My friends, they love my intelligence
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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