try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
