Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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