ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
