Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
