so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
