Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize