Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
pray to the hookup gods
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
