but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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