I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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