You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
