im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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