Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
even my farts smell like vagina
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
