Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
