see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
