Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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