This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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