i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
