Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
