so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
