Having a random hookup so left but love u
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
