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First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
